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Letter "D" » David Letterman Quotes
(Click a letter to view the authors)
«We have defeated Saddam Hussein and Iraq. The good news is Iraq is ours, and the bad news is Iraq is ours.»
Author: David Letterman
(Comedian, Host)
| Keywords:
Bad News, defeated, Good News, Hussein, Iraq, Saddam, Saddam Hussein
«Here's a little known fact - Arnold is the first body builder to run for governor since Janet Reno.»
Author: David Letterman
(Comedian, Host)
| Keywords:
Arnold, builder, governor, governors and, JANET, Janet Reno, Reno, run for
«There's no business like show business, but there are several businesses like accounting.»
«Last night the United States dropped four 2,000 pound bombs on Saddam Hussein. I don't know anything about explosives, but, my God, do those things even need to explode?»
Author: David Letterman
(Comedian, Host)
| Keywords:
bombed, bombing, bombs, dropped, explode, explodes, exploding, explosives, Hussein, pound, pounded, pounding, Saddam, Saddam Hussein, States, the United States, united, United States
«New York now leads the world's great cities in the number of people around whom you shouldn't make a sudden move.»
Author: David Letterman
(Comedian, Host)
| About:
America and Americans,
Cities,
New York
| Keywords:
City of New York, move around, moving around, sudden
«Tip to out-of-town visitors: If you buy something here in New York and want to have it shipped home, be suspicious if the clerk tells you they don't need your name and address»
Author: David Letterman
(Comedian, Host)
| Keywords:
address, clerk, clerking, name and address, out-of-town, shipped, suspicious, The Visitors, tip, visitors
«The big debate right now is if Saddam is alive or dead. He's dead, then he's alive, then dead, then alive. It's just confusing. Today they showed videotape, and Saddam was speaking at his own funeral.»
«We inadvertently bombed the Chinese Embassy. But Clinton now is working very hard. He has sent a letter of apology to the Chinese. And, he's also given them a gift certificate for future nuclear secrets.»
Author: David Letterman
(Comedian, Host)
| About:
Funny
| Keywords:
apology, bombed, certificate, certificates, Chinese, Clinton, embassy, inadvertently, Letter of, Nuclear bomb
«Based on what you know about him in history books, what do you think Abraham Lincoln would be doing if he were alive today?1) Writing his memoirs of the Civil War.2) Advising the President.3) Desperately clawing at the inside of his coffin.»
Author: David Letterman
(Comedian, Host)
| Keywords:
Abraham, Abraham Lincoln, advising, civil war, claw, clawing, coffin, desperately, Lincoln, The Civil War
«Number one: Don't frisk me. Don't hurt me physically. Don't get anywhere near my neck. And don't call me Regis. [Advice to his guests]»
Author: David Letterman
(Comedian, Host)
| Keywords:
Call Me, frisk, frisking, guests, number one, physically, Regis
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